By: Cassandra M. Faraci, Psy.D.
The holiday season, with the anticipation of celebration, togetherness, and joy, is often one of the most stressful times of the year. As we enter November and the holiday hustle, it’s important to recognize that this season can also take a toll on our mental and emotional well-being in the forms of stress, exhaustion, and even burnout.
Many people become overwhelmed by the pressures of planning, gift-giving, family dynamics, and managing the perfect holiday experience. The result? Burnout—characterized by emotional exhaustion, physical fatigue, and a sense of detachment from what should be an enjoyable time. There might even be feelings of guilt – guilt that we’re not finding joy and are struggling to be mentally present with our families when our stress levels lead us to wish the holiday would go quickly.
But this doesn’t have to be your experience. By committing to self-care strategies this year, you can prevent holiday burnout and protect your mental health, allowing you to truly enjoy the season.
What Is Holiday Burnout?
Holiday burnout occurs when the stress of the season becomes overwhelming, leading to physical and emotional exhaustion. Many of us feel the pressure to meet high expectations—whether it’s preparing the perfect meal, buying the right gifts, or juggling holiday parties and family obligations. For some, the holidays can also trigger feelings of loneliness, grief, or financial strain, adding an extra layer of emotional weight.
Symptoms of holiday burnout can include:
- Fatigue: Constant tiredness, even after resting.
- Irritability: Feeling easily frustrated or snapping at others.
- Emotional numbness: Feeling detached or unenthusiastic about the holiday celebrations.
- Difficulty concentrating: Struggling to stay focused or feeling scattered.
- Resentment: Feeling obligated to attend events or do things you don’t want to, leading to bitterness.
Recognizing these signs early on is key to preventing full-blown burnout. The good news? There are plenty of strategies to help you manage stress and enjoy a healthier, more balanced holiday season.
- Set Realistic Expectations
One of the biggest sources of holiday burnout is the desire for everything to be perfect. Whether it’s hosting the ideal family gathering, finding the best gifts, or maintaining every tradition, the pressure to live up to high expectations can be overwhelming.
To avoid this trap, remind yourself that good enough is often more than enough. Remember, most people will remember the feeling the holidays provided them, not the meal, the gifts, or the areas in which you didn’t meet your expectations. There isn’t one way to do a holiday. There isn’t one way to make memories. The details that are important to you may not be necessary to the essence of the holiday. The holidays don’t need to be flawless to be meaningful. Your family and friends want to be with you. It will be more meaningful for you to be present, not perfect. Set realistic goals for what you can accomplish, and let go of the idea that you have to do everything. Simplify where you can, and focus on what truly matters—connection, joy, and presence.
- Prioritize Your Mental and Physical Health
During the holidays, it’s easy to let healthy habits slip. Late nights, indulgent foods, and packed schedules can leave you feeling drained. While it’s fun to enjoy the season’s treats and festivities, it’s essential to balance that with self-care. Consult with a medical professional to determine what is appropriate for your individual needs; below are just general suggestions that should not replace recommendations by a medical provider.
- Sleep: Make sleep a priority. Aim for 7-9 hours of rest each night, and establish a calming bedtime routine to help you wind down after busy days.
- Nutrition: While holiday foods are part of the fun, try to incorporate nutritious meals into your routine to keep your energy levels stable.
- Exercise: Physical activity can be a powerful antidote to stress. Even if you can’t fit in your usual workout, take a walk outside, do some stretching, or find ways to move your body.
- Mindfulness: Take time each day to check in with yourself. Whether it’s through meditation, deep breathing, or journaling, mindfulness practices can help you stay grounded amid the chaos.
- Set Boundaries Around Your Time and Energy
This is one of the most difficult recommendations to follow (even for us!). The holidays often come with a packed social calendar—work parties, family gatherings, gift exchanges, and more. While connecting with others is important, overcommitting to events can lead to exhaustion and resentment.
It’s okay to say no to some invitations. Protect your time by prioritizing the events and activities that are most meaningful to you. Give yourself permission to decline engagements that feel like too much, and remember that it’s better to attend fewer events (and be mentally present and joyful) than to show up to everything feeling depleted.
- Practice Gratitude to Shift Focus
We’ll have another blog about this later in the month, but it’s important to mention in a self-care article. Holiday stress can often stem from focusing on what’s missing or what’s not going as planned. Practicing gratitude is a simple but powerful way to shift your focus to what’s positive and present in your life.
Try keeping a gratitude journal during the holiday season. Each day, write down a few things you’re thankful for, no matter how small. This practice can help reduce stress, enhance your mood, and remind you of the true meaning of the season—connection, love, and appreciation for the people and experiences in your life.
- Delegate and Ask for Help
You don’t have to do everything on your own. One of the best ways to prevent burnout is by asking for help. Delegate tasks, whether it’s asking family members to help with cooking, gift-wrapping, or decorating. Many people are more than willing to pitch in—they just need to be asked especially if they’re used to you shouldering all of the tasks! Have a meeting with your family and ask if there are tasks that they’d enjoy doing or would be better skilled at doing. You might be surprised that a task that brings you dread brings joy to someone else.
When you spread the responsibilities, you reduce your own stress and also create a sense of shared experience, which can bring people closer together.
- Take Breaks to Refresh
It’s easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of holiday preparations, but don’t forget to take breaks. Whether it’s stepping outside for fresh air, reading a book, or spending quiet time with a cup of tea, make sure you’re giving yourself moments to recharge.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, listen to your body and take a step back. Sometimes the most productive thing you can do is rest, and once you’re recharged, you’ll be more efficient at getting the tasks done.
- Remember What the Holidays Are Truly About
When the stress of gift shopping, event planning, and social obligations feels overwhelming, take a step back and reflect on what the holidays are truly about for you. Whether it’s spending time with loved ones, reflecting on the year, or giving back to your community, focusing on the core values of the season can help you stay grounded and reduce stress.
Remember, the holiday season is meant to be a time of warmth, connection, and rest—not a race to the finish line. Give yourself the gift of slowing down, prioritizing your well-being, and savoring the moments that make this time of year special.